If two people do not know how to be open and constantly suspect each other of small and major sins, this is a big problem that can lead to a feeling of inner loneliness. In such a situation, both partners have to get rid of the psychological distance and learn how to build trust in their relationship. The first rule: what goes around comes around, and if you want to trust, stop lying and be straight-forward with your beloved. In addition to this, we will talk about some extra methods on how to destroy the wall of doubts and understatement between the couple.
What can cause a lack of trust?
There are many reasons that can lead to your partner not believing you, among them:
1. You behave insincerely, and your beloved feels it.
2. A partner started to lie to you himself, so they try to distract attention from his dishonesty.
3. You have become to control your partner too much, or they try to control you.
4. You are not confident in your relationship or not sure you match each other.
5. You are simply behaving suspicious and hiding some parts of your life from your beloved.
As you can see, sources of problems inside the couple can be various. That is why it is especially important that from the very start of your relationship you talked about your problems and discussed everything instead of hiding it. Either way, you will give your partner strong reasons to suspect you in insincerity.
How to build trust in a relationship?
Building trust is a process requiring great understanding and feeling your partner on a deeper level. You personally should know the key to a successful renovation of trust in your couple because you know your loved one better than anyone else. However, there are a few general rules that you can implement in your everyday communication to solve this problem.
Talk about your feelings. Not only about love or admiration – about everything. Including how you feel when your partner says a joke you don’t find funny, as it touches your confidence. One should speak calmly and confidently. Even if you feel furious and harmed, say “yes, I am very angry now, but I love this person and do not want to argue” out loud and continue communication. Here are types of men to avoid for getting rid of toxic relationship.
Listen, listen, and listen once more. Does your partner have a habit to interrupt you? It puts you down because it shows you that they are not interested in what you are saying, don’t trust your opinion, and don’t bother to listen to you. But do not try to “cure” it, as it won’t help. Better try writing to him/her letters. If not by hand at least email. You can start with the words, “Dear, before you respond to this letter, read it completely.” It helps. In addition, notes and postcards are a clear sign of attention. And trust loves attention!
Stop explaining their actions for them. Let’s say, you and your ex-boyfriend had a long telephone conversation. For you, the situation is obvious: you have stayed friends, you now have certain problems that only he can help you with. But in your man’s head, this does not look so simple. So how would you feel if he suddenly accused you of cheating or disrespecting him? Situations like this appear because our partners don’t always know all the details of what we are doing. Instead of making your beloved nervous next time, explain everything to him in advance and never try to explain his actions if you don’t know the truth.
If you don’t accept their past. By doing this, you are forcing your beloved to defend themselves and lie. To get to know your partner better, ask those questions about their life they are interested in answering. About childhood, tastes, goals, desires, dirty tricks, or insecurities. And be ready to hear honest answers. Imagine how would you feel if your partner says they hate sport, and you have been playing football for several years. Next time they ask you anything sport-related, you will avoid the answer and behave suspiciously. That is because your partner shouldn’t have put you under pressure, and you should have been honest about your past.
Double asking. Each time you question your beloved’s decision, it makes them feel you don’t trust them. And if you do this second time, this is a real problem. “Why?” is a popular question, but before making a scandal, ask yourself, why aren’t you allowing your partner to take the initiative? And what do you think will come out of it?
Excessive interest in their plans. Did your spouse talk about any plans related to both of you? Then let it go. You both can have things that are better not to be shared with anyone. Yes, it includes talking about everything and not hiding your problems at the same time. But if your partner wants to leave some plans just for themselves, trust them.
Do you know any other ways to build trust in your relationship? Let us know in the comments section!
